Utilitarianism, or Not

Ok, so, I don't claim to be really smart or a scholar or anything but sometimes I do read non-fiction books to help me understand life a little better. I happen to be reading a VERY thick book, in both senses of the word, called "Love and Responsibility" by the late John Paul II. For those of you who have read it, I apologize for my very weak understanding and ramblings and if you could help me out in the comments section that would be great. For those of you who haven't read it, take whatever I say with a bottle of salt. Anyway, here is the quote which gave me chills:

"If, while regarding pleasure as the only good, I also try to obtain the maximum pleasure for someone else- and not just for myself, which would be blatant egoism- then I put a value on the pleasure of this other person only in so far as it gives pleasure to me: it gives me pleasure, that someone else is experiencing pleasure. If, however, I case to experience pleasure , or it does not tally with my 'calculus of happiness'- (a term often used by utilitarians) then the pleasure of the other person ceases to be my obligation, a good for me, and may even become something positively bad. I shall then- true to the principles of utilitarianism- seek to eliminate the other person's pleasure because no pleasure for me is any longer bound up with it- or at any rate the other person's pleasure will become a matter of indifference to me and I shall not concern myself with it." (italics added)

WOAH! Right? I mean, talk about crazy! That IS the situation of most relationships and "marriages" in the U.S. and most other Western countries. This struck me particularly in contrast with a wedding I just attended for a childhood friend. Her pastor outright told her and her husband-to-be that their marriage would only work if they put each other first. He knew, he'd been married for thirtysomething years. I have great hope for them as a strong Christian couple and pray that they take his advice. But I know this isn't the case for most people.

It breaks my heart to think that this utilitarian ideology has so permeated our society that marriage is reduced to an institution merely for pleasure and convenience. Having been taught all my life what marriage really is, and what it is supposed to accomplish, the more I think about how things are today the more I am revolted. But more than revolted, I am in anguish for those people, those souls, who don't know the truth.

I guess all I can do is pray for more grace for them so that in some way I can share in the struggle.

Quick Takes...

I have to say something. I don't generally like reading other people's "quick takes". I know, I'm a horrible person, but I decided that maybe I'll be cured of that by writing my own. (Maybe?) Here goes.

1. The person who invented apple butter is a sadist. Seriously. "Oo! Here is something delicious but you have to stand over a stove just stirring and stirring and getting hot little bits of apple mush on your arms! And then for all your efforts, what started out as twelve quarts of apples will now only be two! Haha! So fun!"

2. For the past oh, nigh on 5ish days I have been CRAVING ICE. Like I thought I was thirsty but no- MUST HAVE ICE. Finally I Googled "craving ice" and wouldn't you know, craving ice is a sign of anemia! Google, you're so good to me. How else would I have known? Out come the Floradix pills.

3. Re-listening to Bill Cosby stand-up. Possibly the funniest guy on the face of the Earth. No, scratch, THE funniest guy on the face of the Earth. What could be better than the Niagra Falls sketch? "And I said to myself, 'Why should I tell her?'" HI-larious.

4. Ballet class. Yep. Performing to Mary J. Blige's "Good Love." Not joking. Still kinda freaked out.

5. How many of these am I supposed to do? 7?

6. Lurfing the Fall weather. It's chilly and windy and sunny and perfect. My favorite time of year without doubt. Also, who doesn't love crunching little leaves under his feet? Crunch...crunch...crunchcrunchcrunch. There's something so satisfying about it. If you see a girl jumping from leaf to leaf on the sidewalk and laughing, it's me.

7. MY LITTLE PEOPLE GET HOME TOMORROW!!!!!!!! Meaning Blaisey and Camilla. I have missed them so. :)

Ok, so It was sort of fun-ish to write. What do you think? Yes? No? I need sleep. Good night.