1am Means it's Friday, Right?

Quick-ish takes.

1. I love the way snow looks when it's illuminated by streetlights. Twirling beauties that would otherwise fall shrouded in darkness dance in the spotlight. Each little flake, so unknown to the world before this, shows her face and gives it everything. A graceful pas de mille.

2. My boyfriend just joined my church's choir. We had our first rehearsal tonight and when I was looking around, as I usually during rehearsal, I kept saying to myself, "Who is the cute new guy?...Oh, wait, that's Jeff." I seriously did it like three times.

3. I get to sleep in tomorrow (today?) ! It's exciting. I've been waking up weekday mornings to babysit my niece and nephew. But tomorrow (no really? is it today?) is one of my days "off." Although, I have to say, it is pretty nice to spend the morning times with the kids- they're always wayyy more cheerful than in the evenings. Plus, picking up a two year old out of his crib when he's all sleepy and snuggles you is extremely gratifying.

4. I made a bunch of earrings to give to the girls who are hosting me when I go to Florida next week. They're pretty pretty. Right now they're on my desk so that I can try and figure out what to box them in. Any suggestions? I have five pairs.

5. The twinkle lights are still up in my room. I have no plans to take them down. You will have to physically fight me (and win) before they come down. Who says pretty lights are just for Christmas time?

6. Someone was braking on the on-ramp to the highway today. I didn't know what to do, they were going like 20mph and braking. Thankfully it was 12:30am and no one was on the road really so I had a huge break in traffic to pass them and speed up. It was a little slippery so I drove about 20mph under the speed limit but when I got to my exit there was another car on the off ramp going 15mph!! This ramp was clear of snow/ice and I was just so confused as to why this person was going so slowly. Maybe they had a disability or something. Or, snow makes people crazy.

7. I got a card from my Nana today. I love getting letters from her, they're always so sweet and thoughtful. But they always make me more painfully aware of how little I know my dad's side of the family. I wish I knew them better.

When I was a child I always thought of pregnant women as mute. In my adolescent mind a woman carrying something so sacred was surrounded by a sacred silence of her own. Now, obviously this is insane- "Do you think she's having contractions?" "I don't know, she can't say."- pregnant women need to be able to communicate, maybe even more so than other people. And I had seen and talked to pregnant women, but that image still remained- it sometimes comes back even to this day.
As I was thinking about it more I came to realize that birth is the most marvelous thing about life. I know, you're thinking "Uh, duh." but I just catch on a little late is all. I have to confess that I'm a marveler. I'm "that guy," the one that weirds her sister out by getting a little too excited about a summer rainstorm. I'm the one who stops to smell, well, anything. So when you combine those two things, the fact that, even as a child, I somehow knew the most wonderful thing about life was birth, and my tendency to marvel at all things God-made, you get a twenty-year-old who still sometimes thinks of pregnant women as ensconced in a sacred silence.

"In the silence of the stable there was wisdom finally heard."

An Angry Advent?

As I've gotten older, and more into liturgical seasons, Advent has become more important to me. Each week the readings at mass are more significant to me personally, and reflecting on them becomes more pleasurable and anticipatory. That being said, I have a confession to make. I have secretly started to become increasingly angry at the secular world for their "Merry Christmas" signs, the fact that they start playing Faith Hill's version of "O Holy Night" starting the day after Thanksgiving, and, most importantly, that they've made Christmas into a materialistic cash cow.

One particular day I was walking around frustrated that "Silent Night" had been playing on the radio when some combination of my conscience and my guardian angel chided me. I felt somewhat embarrassed and stopped. And as I thought about it more I realized being angry wasn't helping anyone (duh) and that I should actually feel sorry for the seculars.

My theory is that by making the Christmas season appear earlier than it should the secular world, on some level, has made us Catholics feel either guilty that we don't feel comfortable saying "Merry Christmas" back to the cashier at the store, or defensive and, subsequently, (at least on my part) angry. We don't say "Merry Christmas" on the first Sunday of Advent, we don't sing Christmas carols at mass, and so we're the weird ones, right? We need to get all uptight and shout loudly whenever we see a Christmas sign "PEOPLE, IT'S NOT CHRISTMAS YET!! TAKE THIS FREAKIN' SIGN DOWN!" Right?

Wrongo. The first thing we should do is continue practicing our faith. Let's check ourselves first and make sure we're doing everything as well as we can. Yes? Good? Ok next let's pray for the seculars. Yes, that's right! This is what I didn't understand until recently: because the secular world doesn't share in this time of reflection and anticipation neither can they share fully in the culmination of joy that is Christmas. Isn't that sad? Don't you just feel sorry for them? I do. For them Christmas is just a day when everyone happens to get together and give each other presents. For us, we few we happy few, Christmas is about CHRIST. We get to participate in the Christmas liturgy, we get to rejoice, Christ will be born on that day! Isn't it exciting?? I'm pumped, and ready to wait. Christ is worth waiting for.

"Maranatha is a cry of the heart

That's hopeful yet weary of waiting
While it may be joyful with the burdens it bears
It's sick with anticipating
To long for the Promised One day after day
And the promise that soon He'd return
It's certain that waiting's the most bitter lesson
A believing heart has to learn"

-Michael Card "Maranatha"

Lets Chat About Bumper Stickers

So, lately I've been seeing a lot of bumper stickers that make my day for various reasons. Inspired by David's post at the Petroni blog I have decided to tell the world about them!

Let's start off with a classic.

My highly cynical and mean side used to laugh hysterically when I saw these bumper stickers. You idiots. I laugh that you don't know the truth. Bwahahah. Really I should be compassionate, pray for them, and beg forgiveness for them when they're judged, so now these serve as little reminders. Ladies who have these stickers, I can't commend you enough, seriously. In your highly offensive and intolerant way you have just reminded me to pray for you. So, thanks, some good did come of your bumper sticker.

BAHAHHAHAH! Just sayin'. This one always makes me laugh, no matter how many times I see it. Although when I first saw it my laugh was kind of like "haha! that guy's dumb!" Now it's more like "hah...ahhaah....ahhhhhhh! That guy's ruining our country! *hyperventilation*."

Keeping in the political realm here is another one that, just wows me. I can't get over it.

Yuk, yuk, yuk!! SERIOUSLY! You're too stupid to know that you're AN idiot! An illiterate idiot! Please, try running the country with your 1.7 gpa. Let me know how it goes. And in the next election you might try this thing called "voting." You get to choose which person you want to be president! It's for real!

Ok, last political one, I swear.

Hee hee hee! Done! Done! Moving on.

Hiiiiilarious! Probably the best "honor student" variation I've seen. So funny.

Anyway! Those are all ones that I've seen or heard about, so I'm out of bumper stickers. You guys have any you want to share?

Anatomy of an Email.

So here's what's what...

Recently I realized that a) I need to post something funny, and 2) I have lost my funny.

Yes, this is the truth. I no longer possess the ability to be funny. Possibly it is due to the fact that I've started drinking my coffee black. There is nothing humorous about black coffee, so, in an effort to improve itself, it must have stolen my funny. No, I'm not bitter, (the coffee is, though) just disappointed- I expected more from my coffee.

(You see? Terrible, not funny at all.)

So I thought to myself, "Well, I still need to post something funny. What about one of those emails you sent to Miriel?" Miriel is my sister. Sometimes, in an effort to add some color to her day, I send her emails that are somewhat humorous. I hope by looking at this email and telling you it's working parts I can start to get my funny back. My comments are italicized. Here goes.

Dear Ye Olde Sister... Title must be humorous to attract immediate attention.

I am breaking Dave Barry's mandatory rule that anyone who puts and "e" at the end of a word unnecessarily has to pay $50,000 per use to the IRS. Please don't tell anyone. I don't think you're olde. In fact, you're youthful and beautiful and any man who sees you is a fool not to fall at your feet! (How DO you walk around?)

Excessive flattery in an email has a rate of return that is 9.86 times faster than a regular email. True fact. Nope, just kidding, made that one up.

So I was just dropping you this...drop...this uhh...thing-a-ma-jig...email?

No idea. In retrospect this was not funny at all.

Yes, this is an email. Check. To see if you were uhh...doing alright. Yes, check. I'm sorry, it's just that we haven't talked in so long that I'm having trouble remembering your middle name.

A humorous little something that can't possibly be true adds depth.

I remember you last name because it's the same as our sisters': Gosher. Yep.

Also not true.

(Minnesota accent) Everyone loves a good Minnesota accent. ...Shut up, yes you do.
So ah, I really miss yeh, to say the least. I cried whilst perusing yer blog because I miss yeh so much. Now ah, I mean, I do cry easy, but don't let that getcha down. I done did that cryin' all fer yeh.

In all seriousness, I am almost depressed enough to drink away my troubles with the bottle of black fig vinegar that is sitting on the windowsill right now. I'm sure there's barely enough alcohol left in it to get a mouse drunk (a drunk mouse! haha!) but it would for sure make me throw up. Which is...exactly the opposite of what I want. Huh. Ok. I need to get some depression lessons.

We need to talk soon. For cereal. Or, we could just start an enormous email chain. Whaddaya think?

Leven'smooches from your youngest yet, ironically, biggest sister,
No, people this does not mean "Eleven Smooches." Do you see an apostrophe before it? No! Therefore it means what it sounds like, which is "Love and smooches" gosh.

TIRIRNNENNNENE

This type of signature is more likely to make the reader laugh and feel compelled to email back immediately. Brilliant, no?

Hm. Still not funny. I'll let you know when I find my funny again. Do you have any suggestions/ideas for getting it back? I need it soon, Thanksgiving is coming up!! And then Christmas. If I don't have it back by then, I might have to have myself committed. And, as much as you all want that to happen, my nephew would miss me. He's only almost two, have pity.

Utilitarianism, or Not

Ok, so, I don't claim to be really smart or a scholar or anything but sometimes I do read non-fiction books to help me understand life a little better. I happen to be reading a VERY thick book, in both senses of the word, called "Love and Responsibility" by the late John Paul II. For those of you who have read it, I apologize for my very weak understanding and ramblings and if you could help me out in the comments section that would be great. For those of you who haven't read it, take whatever I say with a bottle of salt. Anyway, here is the quote which gave me chills:

"If, while regarding pleasure as the only good, I also try to obtain the maximum pleasure for someone else- and not just for myself, which would be blatant egoism- then I put a value on the pleasure of this other person only in so far as it gives pleasure to me: it gives me pleasure, that someone else is experiencing pleasure. If, however, I case to experience pleasure , or it does not tally with my 'calculus of happiness'- (a term often used by utilitarians) then the pleasure of the other person ceases to be my obligation, a good for me, and may even become something positively bad. I shall then- true to the principles of utilitarianism- seek to eliminate the other person's pleasure because no pleasure for me is any longer bound up with it- or at any rate the other person's pleasure will become a matter of indifference to me and I shall not concern myself with it." (italics added)

WOAH! Right? I mean, talk about crazy! That IS the situation of most relationships and "marriages" in the U.S. and most other Western countries. This struck me particularly in contrast with a wedding I just attended for a childhood friend. Her pastor outright told her and her husband-to-be that their marriage would only work if they put each other first. He knew, he'd been married for thirtysomething years. I have great hope for them as a strong Christian couple and pray that they take his advice. But I know this isn't the case for most people.

It breaks my heart to think that this utilitarian ideology has so permeated our society that marriage is reduced to an institution merely for pleasure and convenience. Having been taught all my life what marriage really is, and what it is supposed to accomplish, the more I think about how things are today the more I am revolted. But more than revolted, I am in anguish for those people, those souls, who don't know the truth.

I guess all I can do is pray for more grace for them so that in some way I can share in the struggle.

Quick Takes...

I have to say something. I don't generally like reading other people's "quick takes". I know, I'm a horrible person, but I decided that maybe I'll be cured of that by writing my own. (Maybe?) Here goes.

1. The person who invented apple butter is a sadist. Seriously. "Oo! Here is something delicious but you have to stand over a stove just stirring and stirring and getting hot little bits of apple mush on your arms! And then for all your efforts, what started out as twelve quarts of apples will now only be two! Haha! So fun!"

2. For the past oh, nigh on 5ish days I have been CRAVING ICE. Like I thought I was thirsty but no- MUST HAVE ICE. Finally I Googled "craving ice" and wouldn't you know, craving ice is a sign of anemia! Google, you're so good to me. How else would I have known? Out come the Floradix pills.

3. Re-listening to Bill Cosby stand-up. Possibly the funniest guy on the face of the Earth. No, scratch, THE funniest guy on the face of the Earth. What could be better than the Niagra Falls sketch? "And I said to myself, 'Why should I tell her?'" HI-larious.

4. Ballet class. Yep. Performing to Mary J. Blige's "Good Love." Not joking. Still kinda freaked out.

5. How many of these am I supposed to do? 7?

6. Lurfing the Fall weather. It's chilly and windy and sunny and perfect. My favorite time of year without doubt. Also, who doesn't love crunching little leaves under his feet? Crunch...crunch...crunchcrunchcrunch. There's something so satisfying about it. If you see a girl jumping from leaf to leaf on the sidewalk and laughing, it's me.

7. MY LITTLE PEOPLE GET HOME TOMORROW!!!!!!!! Meaning Blaisey and Camilla. I have missed them so. :)

Ok, so It was sort of fun-ish to write. What do you think? Yes? No? I need sleep. Good night.